Temperament tested by noisy nippers and gutless golfers

Losing money to the soundtrack of a crying baby must be in the top ten most disturbing combinations somebody can suffer in the Western world.

I have heard it is an SAS training technique to subject potential recruits to the noise of a crying baby over headphones for several hours to test their mental toughness. If they can handle it without crumbling to the floor in tears of their own, they might just be able to resist brutal interrogation after being captured by the enemy.

I think they should go a step further and make the SAS hopefuls use all their available funds up to their bank overdraft limits on outright golf wagers, then play the tape of the crying baby while making them watch the golf on mute. That would soon sort the men from the boys. I reckon they would all have quit by the Monday morning and be begging for the role of regiment cook.