The high street would be a poorer place without betting shops

Two years back the government unveiled a website for citizens to launch their own petitions, with the potential for a parliamentary debate if they hit 100,000 signatures. If you go on the official website you can browse the rejected efforts and, if you enjoy marvelling at what gets people irate, the list makes for entertaining reading.

There's the demand, for example, that fish 'n' chips be served in newspaper again (a potential Ukip policy platform if ever I saw one); an insistence that Emmerdale scrap the 'dog theft storyline' and make a public apology; a call for government to force Kate Bush to release the footage of certain live shows; a well-intentioned rant against 'mordern [sic] day slavery'; and a stirring rallying call for Theresa May to ban Christmas decorations from going up before December 1, an illiberal move that I nevertheless think we can all get behind. Basically, whatever you feel strongly about, there's probably already a petition about it.

I've always thought petitions were about as pointless as wasps ('cull wasps', argues one cogent petition) and as effective as Southern Rail (thousands of angry petitioners) so don't make a habit of signing them when they come by. If I really care about an issue I prefer more direct action than petitions, such as moaning in the pub or daydreaming.