Fisherman failure means much larger hook may be required

That's it. I have officially gone insane. Lock me up. Throw away the key. This brain has no hope of recovery. Golf betting has had it well and truly frazzled. You could make a decent haggis out of it, but that is all it has to offer.

I have backed a player ante-post who has finished second in three of the last four European Tour events – Danny Willett in the Italian Open, Michael Hendry in the Fiji International and Ross Fisher in the Dunhill Links Championship – and my soul has been savaged.

Golf betting provides more of a mental challenge than punting on any other sport. You only bet on horses? Football? Then you haven't got a clue, sunshine. Your brain is in mint condition. Your horserace is over in minutes. Your football match is an hour and a half. And you have a good idea whether you are going to win or lose throughout.