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BILLY BUNTER

Weblog: The football punter

BILLY BUNTER'S RSS FEED POSTED AT 2:49pm 4 OCT 2011

Next manager novelties are way beyond a joke

WHEN was the last time you laughed at a stupid entry in a next manager market?

Any time in the last five years? Then I've got a bone to pick with you.

It's not funny. Like all long-running jokes, it was probably funny at one stage, but it's not funny now. And you're responsible, because it's you the bookmakers are trying to make laugh. And if you've ever actually backed one of these joke contenders... ugh, kill me now.

I admit, I probably had a chuckle when Chas & Dave were priced up as 500-1 shots to take over from Christian Gross at Tottenham, but since then I haven't laughed once. Okay, maybe when I saw Geoff from Byker Grove listed among the runners for the Newcastle job. And I might have smiled when I saw Paul Gascoigne in the betting for the Kettering job, but he actually got that so it doesn't count.

I definitely wasn't amused when I saw Lee Westwood at 1,000-1 to land the Nottingham Forest role.

It doesn't even work. The basic premise of the (not funny) joke is that it's funny (though it's not) to imagine the person quoted actually carrying out the day-to-day roles involved with managing a football club.

It's amusing (if you're easily amused) to imagine Cilla Black at the helm of Liverpool, but there's nothing rib-tickling or even especially surreal about the thought of Westwood in charge of Forest. He's a level-headed, down-to-earth bloke with a rock-solid mentality, so it's a less laughable notion than having say, Joe Kinnear in charge.

All (rubbish) joking aside, trying to find a decent wager on the next Tricky Trees gafferhas not been easy.

Of those heading the market at the moment, Karl Robinson looks the candidate who is the best match, but I rarely back managers at odds-on even when I fancy them, so he looks too short.

I don't like the look of any of his near rivals, particularly the anorexic (frighteningly skinny) odds about Alan Shearer. So I'm going to have to plump for a big-priced outsider.

What price Su Pollard?