BILLY BUNTER

Weblog: The football punter

Brilliant-at-home Gulls can win but not dine out

IF the football season is like a dinner party then this is the awkward bit when some people have finished their main course and are eager to tuck into dessert and others are still enjoying their starters.

League Two play-off contenders Torquay and Cheltenham are certainly in the slow-eating category. They’re still battling it out for a tasty dish of Wembley joy or heartbreak while the rest of us are wolfing down England squad sundaes or next Liverpool manager pie.

I’m going to abandon this catering imagery now – let’s face it, if the football season was a dinner party, it would be a pretty badly-behaved affair, with Mario Balotelli throwing food around and Craig Bellamy winding up fellow diners.

Torquay may have bitten off more than they can chew – sorry, I said I was going to abandon this nonsense – by giving Cheltenham a two-goal first-leg lead. However, the Gulls were brilliant at home in the regular season, losing just three of their 23 games and beating the top two in the division, Swindon and Shrewsbury.

They’re not the most prolific side in the world – that’ll probably be Real Madrid, stats fans! – so I can see them winning tonight’s second leg by a one-goal margin and suffering play-off disappointment for a second season in a row.

And that would leave a sour taste in the mouth.